Horses' SL Wrestling Dirtsheet which doesn't have a name yet

I've decided to break Kayfabe and start an SL Wrestling Dirt  Sheet. Dunno if it's going to be called Horses' Dirty Sheets or Inside Horses' Box... or perhaps something classier. Enough of silly names and down to serious business. I put out some messages for Serious Pro Wrestling Questions. I got some back, I've picked out one from Self proclaimed SL Pro-Wrestling Scoopmeister Norris Norris, who writes...

Horses, Firstly I read your Interview with Ty and felt you came across very poorly. You neglected to mention several feuds where you were carried. Anyway, this isn't the reason i'm contacting you. I wish you to disclose your opinion on the size difference between the very large DCWF Wrestling Ring and the slightly smaller Rings used by VWE, HAWX and other SL Wrestling organisations. Also, to my highly trained eye it looks like the VWE Ring is much higher than the DCWF Ring, does this affect "spots" you and the other Workers do?


Yours, Norris Norris - SLPWScoops

Thank you for your question, Norris Norris. Yes the DCWF Ring is large, probably larger than the VWE ring and larger than the HAWX ring, but not significantly enough to cause a Worker any issues or force us to change our style. Should the ring be a few metres smaller or larger, then we'd have to alter rope running techniques and other things a mark geek like you wouldn't understand.


You say, according to your highly trained eye, the VWE Ring is much higher than the DCWF Ring. Has Honey Bluntz been smoking there or something! Please Norris Norris, If it is higher, it is slightly higher and it makes no difference. I and others don't suffer Metaverse Vertigo and certainly wouldn't over a few centremetres.


Thanks for your question, Norris Norris. Do feel free to send in another.

Ty Interviews a Horses

So being the Number One Wrestler in the Metaverses, you'd expect me to be Number One on Tyress the Nova's list of Interviewee's for her Blog... well I wasn't. I think I was 20-something. But they say the best things happen in your twenties. I don't know who "they" are, but on this occasion "they" know what they're talking about.

It's all here! tyressthenova.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/novas-interview-with-horses.html

It's my life story... kind of. I forgot lots. I also forgot to mention and thank Sugarcube Woller for all he has done. The Interview didn't finish until nearly 6am my time and even later for Ty.

Read it, if you're bored. There's also lots of other interviews on there. You'll find Ty's blog on this Blog's Blogroll, where its been for ages. Read it!!!!

Horses on Horses - Chapter 32: Ivan Halfpint - What a guy!

Ivan Halfpint was an inspiration to me when I first started Wrestling. Ivan was a good man, he helped train me, he was always there for me. We'd talk for hours about Wrestling and life in general. We were probably the best friends in the Metaverses.

We were such great friends we were inches from a suicide pact and inches from marriage. As it was neither happened. Ivan carried on being Ivan the commentator, wrestler and fighter. I became a Wrestling megastar and the face of Slampoo and other Metaverse brands. Sadly those eventually turned to shit and I had to find blame somewhere, because it sure as heck wasn't with me.

I'd shortlisted 4 people as my "Blame Targets". Ivan Halfpint (Sorry, Ivan. It really was either marriage or murder). Alpin Criss (Start at the top). Sidney Washborne (Of course). Paula Wilcox (She broke my neck). In the end I decided to blame Ivan and so undertook a series of underhand attacks on him.

Firstly I hired an undercover agent who's job it would be to infiltrate the then SLCW. His target was the total elimination of Ivan Halfpint. It took time and effort, but Ivan was eventually driven from SLCW. This wasn't good enough though, I wanted more pain inflicted on the bald headed scapegoat.

So I hired an actor, who was to look similar to Ivan and do a similar job to what Ivan did in SLCW. The plan was to undermine him, break his spirit and drive him from the Metaverses for good.

I couldn't find an actor good enough for this, so I hired 45 mutant cats from a pet pimp. They'd control an Ivan-Bot which looked just like a real Ivan Halfpint. Each cat survives about 3 weeks before it dies and needs to be replaced. Over the years the Numbers of cats used has been astronomical, but the success of the project has been without doubt. It's been an absolute triumph! Ivan Halfpint is gone. I actually forget why I wanted rid of him now, but yay!

Horses on Horses - Sample Chapters coming soon

As my great fans know, I have a wonderful book out called Horses on Horses. It's sold lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of copies, but the time has come for me to publish some chapters on my Blog in an attempt to drive sales/have pot shots at people I don't like.

They're coming soon. You can also pick up some sample chapters and the Introduction at The Horse and Biscuit.